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Saber
Posts : 5689 Join date : 2012-01-09 Location : Palm Coast,Florida 32137
| Subject: Enjoy losing ? Mon Feb 27, 2012 9:20 am | |
| I joined a conversation concerning the lack of interest in playing pickup games of darts. The conversation turned to why people do not work to improve their chances for winning and the question – “Why play at all.” My contribution is below.
“I’m looking at your unhappiness with people who don’t work at improving while sitting on a different perch.
I’ve gone through a long career in darts – from near obsession to present during which I’ve struggled with how to enjoy the game without winning at it. This has always been a contradiction to me – like how can you enjoy losing?? This, I think, comes close to your view of why do it at all? Here’s my update: I quit playing altogether for the last four years because I kept getting my a– handed to me and couldn’t take it. Not playing with absolute confidence that I could beat anyone I came up against made engaging in competitions something I came to dread rather than look forward to doing. Last night I played in league, back in my old stomping grounds, for the first time in ten years and I played as well as I thought I would – lousy – worse than lousy. But I discovered what I hadn’t really been able to understand all those years. I was enjoying the shared inability of all of us on the team. (I’m back to playing in a lower division). We tried but just don’t have it, and the good part is that since we know we don’t have the ability, it’s OK. We could enjoy the effort and complement each other on that rather than the accomplishment. And, best of all, my team mates were enjoying my companionship rather than how well I can play the game. I’ve been so afraid of embarrassing myself, and worrying that people would think less of me because of my accomplishments and reputation that I’ve completely missed this part of participation.
I know the exhilaration of competing at the highest level and each person feeding off the excellent play of the other – fantastic stuff.
I’ve known all along about recreational players but never really related to that frame of mind. Maybe my revelation is why so many people don’t have the fire in their belly to compete? Maybe I’ve been right all along about the 80% of people who do not compete at darts, but rather play at it? Maybe I didn’t have the correct understanding of their motive?
Article copied by permission from Howtodarts and George Silberzahn |
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Saber
Posts : 5689 Join date : 2012-01-09 Location : Palm Coast,Florida 32137
| Subject: Re: Enjoy losing ? Mon Feb 27, 2012 9:22 am | |
| Well I must have the fire because I always play to win. Don't care who it is! LOL |
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USMC80
Posts : 4871 Join date : 2012-01-17 Age : 44 Location : nj
| Subject: Re: Enjoy losing ? Mon Feb 27, 2012 9:35 am | |
| It's the only reason I play. I can hang out with my teammates any night of the week, so its not for the social aspect of it. I got sick of losing and now practice probably about 20 hrs a week. So to practice that much and lose is a kick in the :!: . I expect alot of myself but at the same time I know it takes years, not weeks. But I will get to where I want to be. |
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McInnis180
Posts : 840 Join date : 2012-01-18 Age : 50 Location : Nova Scotia
| Subject: Re: Enjoy losing ? Mon Feb 27, 2012 11:32 am | |
| I love to improve myself and spend a lot of time practising. The problem around here is that you have to travel in order to get anywhere to play. Which cost money and time....the two things I do not have a lot of...lol. This weekend there is a ranked event in Halifax which I have been trying to get to...here is the kicker...have a drive there for nothing but I have to work....can't win! Like USMC80....I expect a lot of myself and get down on myself when I do not shoot well....but that is something that I myself am working on controlling!!! |
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CanadianBacon
Posts : 375 Join date : 2012-01-17 Age : 37 Location : Ontario
| Subject: Re: Enjoy losing ? Mon Feb 27, 2012 1:04 pm | |
| i haven't been playing very long but a lot of the better players that i know who have been playing for a long time have a keen interest in helping me develop. i've only been playing since september and league since mid october but so far i've been called up to play in our a-division and have been told i'm doing quite well so far. i don't have much of killer instinct but i do like to win, but i also don't mind losing. a lot of the guys i play with week in and week out are quality players. (our top 3 players regularly shoot 120s-180s and plus ton outs. all three of them are tied for the highest out at 170 each) some nights the score doesn't show well for me (21-0, 20-1, 16-5) but it also doesn't show how close the matches were and that for many of the games i was putting pressure on them. right now i'm not winning a lot, but i am getting much better. i think i'm doing quite well for myself so far given my lack of experience, so we'll see how things go later on down the road :pirat:
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madzkymadz
Posts : 105 Join date : 2012-01-25
| Subject: Re: Enjoy losing ? Mon Feb 27, 2012 1:23 pm | |
| I have been playing darts seriously for 1 year now. Seriously means I will practice at least an hour everyday to prepare for the upcoming comp in our local pub. I used to play darts casually and for fun because I enjoy camaraderie and the social ties that bond with. I feel like losing was just part of the game and I feel no hard feelings if I lose. Now that I have the will to play darts, I want to make sure that I will augment my chances of winning a match so that I can win a championship locally and I want to make my dad proud. My dad plays darts since I was a kid and darts got me hooked in my teens but I stopped playing when I stepped in to college. Now that I finished my degree, I want to play darts again and I want to be competitive. Sorry if this my seem off topic. Just enjoyed reading Larry's post because it gives us learning experience. |
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getagrip
Posts : 8793 Join date : 2012-01-09 Age : 54 Location : North Yorkshire
| Subject: Re: Enjoy losing ? Mon Feb 27, 2012 9:04 pm | |
| I dont compete in darts, but I know from anything else I have done in the past that I don't like to lose, sure I will put a brave face on and appear to accept it graciously but deep down I have always been seething.
Even when I was a yellow belt and had to fight a world karate champ in a team event, I knew I would get beat but I did well against him and in the end only lost by a half point so was absolutely gutted.
No, I doubt anyone enjoys losing really, even if it's just a game of Tiddly Winks, I still want to win LOL! |
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Bovrilheid
Posts : 389 Join date : 2012-01-16 Location : Shetland
| Subject: Re: Enjoy losing ? Mon Feb 27, 2012 10:26 pm | |
| If I lose at darts it takes me a couple of days to get over it.....I know it is only a game, but it affects me big time. I try to be a gracious loser and I believe I am.....but......I don't mind getting "beaten" but I hate "Losing"
I'll try and explain....if I play a good player and he plays much better darts than me and I play well, I can accept that easily.....for example if phil taylor plays me and hits a 15 darter against me and I am on a finish or get a shot at a double....then I am fine...the better player won.
However if I "lose" a match by having say, 6 darts at a double to win it.....then it is me that has lost it rather than the other fellow winning......do you follow???
It is all quite internal. |
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Saber
Posts : 5689 Join date : 2012-01-09 Location : Palm Coast,Florida 32137
| Subject: Re: Enjoy losing ? Tue Feb 28, 2012 1:34 am | |
| - Bovrilheid wrote:
- If I lose at darts it takes me a couple of days to get over it.....I know it is only a game, but it affects me big time. I try to be a gracious loser and I believe I am.....but......I don't mind getting "beaten" but I hate "Losing"
I'll try and explain....if I play a good player and he plays much better darts than me and I play well, I can accept that easily.....for example if phil taylor plays me and hits a 15 darter against me and I am on a finish or get a shot at a double....then I am fine...the better player won.
However if I "lose" a match by having say, 6 darts at a double to win it.....then it is me that has lost it rather than the other fellow winning......do you follow???
It is all quite internal. Thats me Bo , gonna give ya a thumbs up on this one mate |
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Goofy
Posts : 323 Join date : 2012-01-15 Age : 44 Location : Perth, Scotland
| Subject: Re: Enjoy losing ? Sun Mar 04, 2012 12:41 pm | |
| - Bovrilheid wrote:
- If I lose at darts it takes me a couple of days to get over it.....I know it is only a game, but it affects me big time. I try to be a gracious loser and I believe I am.....but......I don't mind getting "beaten" but I hate "Losing"
I'll try and explain....if I play a good player and he plays much better darts than me and I play well, I can accept that easily.....for example if phil taylor plays me and hits a 15 darter against me and I am on a finish or get a shot at a double....then I am fine...the better player won.
However if I "lose" a match by having say, 6 darts at a double to win it.....then it is me that has lost it rather than the other fellow winning......do you follow???
It is all quite internal. I couldn't have put it better myself! I've lost 3 times in the league this season and only on one of those occasions i came off the board feeling like i should have lost (and therefore accepted it right away), the other two times i know i should have won........ and that does my head in!! |
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